March 4, 2010

The importance of decluttering

"There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will."

I got that from a forwarded e-mail. It got me thinking about my friendships, of course, what with the defriending I've done last year. I've eliminated some people from my life, reconnected with others, befriended new people, and nurtured friendships with the rest.

Am I all the better for it? I believe so. For the longest time, I kept people in my life just because they've always been in my life. Even when it's apparent that everyone outgrew everyone else. Even when it was painfully obvious that their friendships were becoming toxic for me. Okay, I admit, sometimes I wonder if I wasn't too rash. After all, these folks knew me since I was 16 or possibly even younger. But the thing is, I also have friends from the same era with whom I share healthy friendships. They're still around. So it's not as if I totally got rid of everyone. Just those who eventually became emotional clutter in my psyche.

After I did that decluttering, surprise, surprise! Two old friends reconnected with me. Even though so many years have passed, these friends still matter to me and I to them. So yes, clearing up my relationships is worth it. It gave my life enough room to welcome back old friends that somehow, thankfully, found their way back into my life. And I'm all the better for it.