June 3, 2013

Gotta get out, gotta get out

I'm not going to bore you with the details of my current work life. Trust me, I've been so remiss with updating my blog because work has eaten so much of my time and energy. By the time I get home, I'm exhausted.

All I know is, after earning my masters, it's time to practice what I learned. If I can be excellent in a job I know nothing about (which is what's going on right now), what more if it's a job that I know about? 

I know what's wrong.

I never defined my career goals. Or at least nothing past "yeah, I'd like to check out different industries and find out what makes each industry tick". I accept jobs because I enjoy new challenges, and enjoy learning new things. The jobs are usually new positions, which allows me room to define how it'll be, but too new for the position to actually head anywhere. 

I end up in a new, dead-end job with nowhere to go - just more responsibilities, no movement, no real authority, not even higher salaries - stuck and sick, worn-out and worn-down. 

I feel like I'm losing sight of my original calling in pursuit of money (when, in fact, this job is actually $15,000 less than my previous salary). What I'm doing fills my wallet enough but empties my heart. The job's going in a direction I don't want to go. Before the train goes off-track, I'm getting off. I want a career change now.

I've prepared my resignation letter a long time ago. With one signature, I'm out of this place. I know the next best thing is out there. How can it find and hire me if I'm stuck here? I don't want to be here by August 2013. In fact, I don't want to be here now. I cross my fingers that I'll be out of here this month. Hey, we're all allowed to dream, right?

I know my weaknesses - constantly being a firefighter in the workplace, and wanting to learn new things. I can't let problems go unsolved. I solve people's problems, even when it's not my problem to solve. I teach them to go to me when something's wrong and then things will end up great. I am an enabler! :(

I love learning about new things. I've worked in different industries, but never as the expert. I keep aligning myself with bosses who act like father figures but who plot my career without asking me what I want. Then things go downhill. What's more, a deal-breaker for me - in friendships, relationships, etc. - is feeling like I'm being used and/or un-/under-appreciated. It's been going on at work for the longest time. I'm here because I'm afraid of being financially unstable. 

At this point, having a job I enjoy is more important to me than salary. But if I can have both, why not?

2 comments:

Meikah Ybañez-Delid said...

Hooray for you, Cez! :) Yeah, it's time to put your talent and beauty to work! LOL... I am in a similar situation actually, in the sense that I'm in a more left-brained job when I so wanted to be in the right-brained one. What to do! Wish our group could push for a consulting group whose services are up our alley. ;) Anyhoo, I wish you all the best!

Cecilia said...

Thanks, Meikah girl! That's a good idea.