December 16, 2013

430+ down to 401

I never planned for my Facebook friend list to exceed 250. In my head, 250 was the limit, the number of people whose updates I can work with. But I ended up exceeding it, so my next limit was 500. But one day not so long ago, I sat in front of my laptop and thought, "yep, today's the day for decluttering."

Now, you might be wondering, "why on earth are you setting limits on your friend list?" Well, just because I want to. I'm not after a bloated friend list. Nor was it an exercise done out of anger. In fact, I was pretty calm about it.

Surprisingly, it wasn't even a no-brainer who to defriend. Some of those in my list were actually people who I met once in my life. It wasn't even a life-changing moment, so off my list they went. There were others who hung their dirty linens in public...yeah, I know, I shouldn't be shaming them for expressing their feelings. I already hid their updates from my news feed. The negativity was just too much. What difference will it make if I defriend them? Then there were people who I remember more for their hurtful words and actions - not exactly positive associations. Others were just dragged along because they're part of the same team - if I defriend one, then I'll defriend all of them.

Of course, I'm not hiding from them in Facebook. They can still look me up if they notice that I'm missing from their list. I'm not that sort of a coward who'll hide. If I defriend you, you noticed it, and you decided to call me up on it, then I'll tell you why. It might not be pretty, but I'll let you know. I'm fair that way. But I seriously doubt they would, so I'm OK.

I confess, this article "25 Things You Keep In Your Life That Are Only Holding You Back" had a lot to do with my decision. Specifically...

1. The phone numbers of people that never, ever call you or text you first, and often don’t even respond when you text them.
2. Mean or uncomfortable exchanges with people — either in your text or internet history — that you occasionally go over and re-read because they make you feel angry and terrible all over again.
7. Facebook friendships with people you don’t really know, don’t care about, and who post ridiculous things that always make you roll your eyes.

#2's "mean or uncomfortable exchanges" isn't really limited to texts or chats. Some actually relate to face-to-face interactions.

So now I'm down to 401 friends. Which still bothers me because it's not an even number. Who else can be defriended to make it 400? But no one is defriending-worthy at this point. So I should just make peace with the fact that it's 401 and not 400 (yep, I'm strange that way).